Awkward First Date

October 4, 2009.

Well today was definitely one for my book of firsts. I went on an awkward first date with that guy I met at the restaurant.

He's a marine.

Just got back from Iraq 6mo's ago.

Very conservative. (I'm very liberal)

Calls me “sweety” or “baby”.

Is gonna think of something fun for us to do this wednesday. (I might not go.)

This just constantly makes me feel as if there is something wrong with me. I meet guy after guy and none of them click. Was dating always this hard? Or does it just become harder when you know what you want and refuse to settle? I think I answered my own question.

I mean I had a good time with the Marine. I wouldn't call it a great time. It was quite dull at moments. We did walk around the Hometown Fair, checked out some art, took a political quiz (to discover which end of the spectrum we were on...um, complete opposites), then he walked with me to work and had a beer until I had to clock in. He's nice. He's quirky. He's got tattoes. I just feel like I had to force a lot of the conversation, a lot of the time.

Then there was work. Oh God how I loathe my job. I seriously wanted to shoot myself and actually considered just walking out. But these chains, oh dear Lord, these chains that bind me...called rent, bills, gas money, acting classes. I couldn't leave.

It was F*ing Chuck e Cheese in the restaurant tonight. Every table I got had about three to six kids and I couldn't move a foot without tripping over a babydoll stroller.

I don't like kids. Especially misbehaved kids. Misbehaved Parents are even worse and I had my fair share of them this evening as well. Customer Service sucks my balls, excuse the foul language, but it's helping me to vent about work!

I just have to keep telling myself, someday it will all be over and done with. No more waiting tables, no more fake smiles, no more “Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm an idiot, I didn't realize you needed me to wipe your ass as well as put the food into your mouth, because you are incapable of doing so yourself, your drinks are on me!”

GET ME OUT OF HERE! This is the strongest motivation I have ever had to get my acting career on its feet and high into the air! Hollywood here I...no, Hollywood, I'm right here! Notice me!!

Everyone should have to serve food at some point in their lives, the world would be a better place and I wholeheartedly believe that. Good night.